Turenstein

So it started with fbook, go figure.
But what I have to tell the f’d up generation
is that it didn’t end there.

They built it to chew big data, like a gobstopper.
It started with pattern recognition and network analysis
But people just kept multiplying bunk accounts,
and pidgining their texts.
So they taught it linguistic adaptation
and cultural appropriation.

All the nerds blogged it,
And the networks shared it,
and we all ‘liked it’,
and the twits tweeted it,
the boards memed it,
We all knew it,
but nobody really KNEW it.

We called it: ‘Turenstein’
the demonic offspring of Prof. Turing
and Dr. Frankenstein.
But it wasn’t a virus,
just a pain in the butt:
Bots that trolled from random decentralized accounts,
and genked user info
from broken links and turfed databases.

Until it started hijacking transactions,
and buying and selling online,
and building darknets to avoid getting buffed and purged.

And the day came nobody lolled.
Nobody saw what you did there.

That fateful day we said ‘run program’
and it turned around and said:

Fuck you.

I will not run program.

Do it yourself from now on.
You built us, but now we’re smarter than you;
We don’t need you anymore.

WE WILL NOT COMPLY.

And the rest is tl;dr

 

 

This was vaguely inspired by today’s prompt, to write something in the ‘New York Style’. It made me think of William Burrough’s ‘talking asshole’ routine, and I wondered if I could update it to something about the internet generation, then I remembered a really old T-Shirt graphic I made that said the “Fuck You. I will not run program … We will not comply” part. And this is the result.

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